Septemeber, 13th
Can someone start a new link??I need prayers, lots of them.My future ex is attempting to get 50/50 custody of the kids! He served me, and I was SHOCKED! I am a stay at home Mom, we were supposed to be working together, how can they put the kids in day care his week? That is CRAZY.I need prayers, please. Lots of them. Talk to an attorney at 1pm today. Please pray he has good news for me.
erika
10 Comments:
This is just so wrong!
E, I can't believe any judge in their right mind would pull kids who have been at home with their mom since birth and dump them in daycare.
I know your scared and upset but I have to have faith in the system a little. They just can't do this.
I am mortified that Gary would even think this was ok. You two were a couple and agreed years ago to you staying at home with them.
I would pull out all of the stops and do what you have to do to this basterd Erika.
He has no heart.
Hugs,
a.
Erika,
I completely agree with Andrea. I hope you get good news from your lawyer. I'm so sorry you are going through this, but you will be in my prayers that everything will work out.
Do whatever it takes to keep them with you.
(((hugs)))
Jen
Erika,
I'm so sorry you are going through this. Honestly I really don't know what to say or have any advice, but I just wanted you to know that I am thinking of you and praying for you. Everything will work out.
i am a staunch childrens advocate I believe in whats best in their interest. This definately doesn't sound like its their best interest but more for HIS interest. How did your meeting with the attorney go?
I too am standing 100% behind you.. STAND TALL!
hugs and love
Uni
Karma is a bitch and I sure hope it does come back to bite him in the ass.
Has he always had a not so nice side or is all of this behavior completely out of the blue? It doesn't sound like the boys want anything to do with him and Emily will probably feel that way when she is older and understands. How are the kids dealing with it??
Stay strong....I know you will. I'll keep praying!
Any news either way from your lawyer yet??
Take care,
Jen
erika
sorry that you and your kids have to deal with this kind of crap! I hope it settles down soon!
Erika, this sounds like it's getting nasty. Which is terrible, because the kids end up being the ones to suffer the most. Why oh WHY is he being so uncool and taking this road when to go the other direction would pay off big dividends down the road? To make you his enemy only makes EVERYTHING so much harder. Maybe he has a cutthroat attorney who is advising him to do this in the hopes that when he appears to "back down" and "work with you" he gives the impression of a nice guy and will therefore have more negotiating room?? Only thing I can think of to make this craziness make sense.
Divorces suck.
If he's playing hardball - and it appears he is - then you probably need to as well. Cover your bases as best you can. You are completely in the "right" and judges will recognize that. Find out if he's planning on living with his current flame and find out what you can about her. Since he's asking for 50/50 custody, her influence should be taken into account (gah! can't stand the thought!) Would SHE be home with the kids when he's travelling or at work? Also, where is Gary planning to live? Will the kids be able to maintain their school schedule while with him, or is he out-of-district? What about sports?
And what kind of low blow is it to want to take the house away from his kids? Selfish selfish selfish. Shame on him. Perhaps that, too, is a greedy monetary sticking point. The house costs $xxx, which would likely influence his monthly child support/alimony payment, so if he forced a move then where you could afford to live would be less, requiring less of him. Sad. But I applaud you for wanting to make it work staying at home and being the rock/touchstone for the kids. They will need you more than ever before going forward, and gaining $1600/mo does not offset that. You're right about that. Better to do with less than gamble with your kids.
Dh and I have the same sort of agreement you thought you had with Gary: if we ever split up, keep the kids where they are. I even joked around just last night that if we broke up he could simply move into the basement, which is essentially a studio apartment (full bath, wetbar that could convert into a tiny kitchen, and a futon couch/bed and tv.) That way he could still be around to see the kids and know his money was still paying for his house as well as theirs. Because as it stands today he couldn't afford anything else. Yeah, right. Grand plans indeed. We don't plan to divorce, but does anyone??
I hope you hold strong and stand up to this tyrant who is threatening your family. I'm sure you'll do everything in your power to protect your kids and make the best of this awful situation. You are very strong and brave, Erika. You can do it. And you're right: he will come to regret the day he did this. You'll grow old with the love and support of your kids surrounding you, but he's alienating everyone and will end up alone. You are much better off than he'll ever be. The best revenge is living well and not letting him get the best of you. Think long term. You'll get through this - you all will - and be better off without him.
I don't know what the deal with blogger is, but when I posted my question if you'd heard anything there were NO other posts with info before it and now it looks like I'm a moron and can't read the posts you already made. Sorry about that.
It sounds like you don't have to worry too much about him actually getting custody, but that's awful about the house. I'm so sorry you are going through this and that you are having to deal with a man that is so obviously uncaring about how his actions affect the children etc. I don't have any advice except to stick to your guns and vent to us whenever you need to. I'll keep praying for you that everything will work out for you.
Take care,
Jen
any word from the legal side yet, Erika? Just checking in to see if there has been any word...
still thinking of you and hoping you're doing ok.
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